This is my baby Cuddles. She was born on July 5, 2003, to one of my mom's friend's cats, and she and her mommy came to live with us shortly thereafter. She lived a good, long life with us, filled with love and treats and lots of snuggles, but then in March of 2011, we noticed that she was vomiting way more than usual and that she was losing weight. We took her to the vet, and she gave us the worst news that any vet will ever have to give: our baby was dying. She had terminal lymphoma, and she had anywhere from a few weeks to a few months left to live.
Over a year later on May 9, 2012, at the tender age of 8, after a long and valiant fight, she crossed over to the Summerlands. I came home from school yesterday to find her lying on the floor and struggling to breathe. My dad and I didn't want to make any decisions without talking to my mother and my brother first, but the second they came home, my mother took one look at her and said that she wasn't going to live through the next 24 hours. We made the very difficult decision to take her to the vet so that she could have a quick, painless, and peaceful passing, rather than wait the 24 hours and allow her to suffer any further. The vet gave Cuddles a blanket to lie on, and I crouched down at the head of the cold, metal table and stroked her head, telling her that we love her and that Bast would take good care of her. I made sure to keep eye contact with her as the vet gave her the injection, and I watched as she passed quickly and peacefully from this life into the next.
When we got home from the vet's office, I allowed myself to just sit and grieve for a while before getting started with the crossing over ceremony, which my friend Monica sent to me. Once I was ready, I arranged the altar; I used a white candle and a green candle, in which I carved her name and her birth and death dates. I placed these around the Bast statuette that I had sitting on my altar, I propped up the Bast card from Doreen Valiente's Goddess Guidance Oracle Cards behind that, and then I placed Cuddles' picture in front of the Bast card. For the ceremony, I asked Bast and Anubis to guide Cuddles into the afterlife, and then I recited the poem Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep by Mary Elizabeth Frye. After this, I gave Cuddles one last can of her favorite food, as well as a nice healthy pinch of catnip, to take with her into the afterlife. I sent her all of my love and as much energy as I could give to her, and I asked Bast and Anubis to watch over her and to take good care of her until I can meet up with her again.
After the ceremony was finished, I didn't feel any better, but I felt confident that Cuddles had gone where she needed to go. At one point, I was in the kitchen and I could feel her presence on the counter, where she always used to rest. And then, right before I went to bed, I caught a glimpse of her in the upstairs hallway. She was plump, healthy, and full of energy, and that was when I knew for sure that she was ok.
That was beautiful-I'm sure Bast is taking very good care of Cuddles in the Afterlife. Mother looks after Her own, both human and feline. The alter is absolutely lovely, too.
ReplyDeleteThere's a quote that helped me, when we lost Buttons: "Not all that is gone, is gone forever" from O. R. Melling's Chronicle of Faery novels.
I also found an akhu prayer online that I also used when Buttons passed, and I hope it gives you comfort:
"I remember the names of my ancestors. I speak the names of those I love. I speak their names and they live again. May I be so well-loved and remembered. In truth, may the Gods hear my name." From Awakening Osiris: The Egyptian Book of the Dead (p. 54), tanslated by Normandi Ellis
Thank you Amanda. That is a beautiful prayer; I will definitely be using it in any future rituals that I do for Cuddles. :)
ReplyDelete*hugs you so much* <3
ReplyDeleteDid I tell you how amazed I was at how long Cuddles was able to stay with you? It's like she loved you and your family so much that being with you guys made her feel happy more than being ill made her feel bad. Does that make sense?
I love that you gave her food and catnip. :)
And Amanda, I love that prayer so much!
<3<3<3 I believe you did, and we were just as amazed! That absolutely makes sense, and I like to think that it's because of that, that being with us made her happier than being ill made her feel bad. As for the food and the catnip, it just seemed like the thing to do. I honestly didn't even think of the Egyptian context of it until Monica brought it up on Facebook!
ReplyDeleteGlad you both like the prayer! I need to get a copy of that book when I have more money, but the Kemetic akhu prayers are so beautiful. One day I'll get around to composing my own. ;)
ReplyDeleteFood offerings were pretty common in Egyptian funerals, even for pets and I know a few modern Kemetics who will often perform a modified version of the Opening of the Mouth ceremony for their blessed dead as well.
If you want to make traditional offerings for Bast and Cuddles, cool water and bread is always the way to go. Ditto milk and honey (I know in the Celtic cultures, that's also a traditional offering for the Sidhe and the Tuatha De Dannan), which is what I usually offer my akhu. They seem to really like it. :)